Making practical New Years Resolutions when you are separating
It’s that time of year when we all reflect on the year that was and we make resolutions to change our lives in the coming year.
Those resolutions are often about healthy eating habits and fitness. While of course, our wellbeing is important, it involves more than just eating habits and exercise. It requires us to be happy and content in our day to day lives.
If your day to day life is filled with conflict currently, it might be time to consider whether something needs to change in the New Year. Is a separation looming?
This is a hard and heartbreaking decision to make but one that might be necessary if your day to day life is constantly difficult and draining.
Think about it. If you are unhappy, chances are your partner and children are also unhappy so a fresh start may benefit you all.
The New Year is a chance for a fresh start. A fresh start brings challenges but also excitement and opportunity. Separation does not always have to involve conflict. It may simply be the case that you and your partner reach a consensus that things are not working and need to change. If you are in this position, get legal advice early on so that you can have a reasonable discussion with your partner about the separation and what it may look like.
If things look nasty, getting advice early can often help things become amicable again as Lawyers are not involved in the emotional side of your relationship.
If making this big decision is too difficult at this stage, then start with some simple preparation steps:
- Inform yourself about your finances so that you understand what assets you own and exactly what debt you have.
- Get some independence by having your own bank account, making some time for yourself, changing your social media passwords or getting some counselling to ensure you are ok.
- See if your relationship can be repaired with counselling.
- Make sure your children are safe, happy and content. If they are not coping, look at counselling options for them.
- If safe to do so, have a discussion with your partner about how you feel and changes you wish to make.
- If you or your children do not feel safe, reach out to the support services available including the police and DV connect.
If it is an emergency, call 000 immediately. Sometimes, it’s easier to take small steps towards any goal. This makes the goal more achievable. If you need legal advices about how to handle the early stages of your separation or if you just want to understand you options, please contact us.